Tag Archives: fear

Night before easter

Tonight is the night before Easter. The night before the glorious resurrection. In just a few hours, we will celebrate the risen Christ, the coming of new life and the victory over death.
But think with me for a minute. Tonight I can’t help but wonder about the disciples, the followers. Those who had given their all. Those who set aside jobs and families and notoriety to follow this man from Galilee. To trudge after this teacher from Nazareth. Most thought he would bring a revolution and free his people. They thought his kingdom was about to rise up. Even though he warned them for months and even years that his kingdom was not of this world, they still expected him to grant them freedom.
Now it is Saturday night. He has been dead for over 24 hours. He could have called angels to free him, but he didn’t. He had the chance to rise up in glory and demonstrate the sum of his power but he chose not to. Now they sit alone in a darkened upper room, waiting. Every sound could be the government coming for them. Worst of all, they had all scattered like sheep.
They were filled with fear and regret. They were filled with anxiety, not knowing what would happen next.
So many times we find our selves in the same place. We lay looking up at the darkened ceiling, wondering why things have happened. Why didn’t he do something different? Why did the report have to say cancer? Why did the child have to make friends with the wrong crowd? Why did the car breakdown? Why did the accident have to happen?
We live in Saturday night but never realize that tomorrow, Sunday, is on the way. We can get so caught up in the misery of now not noticing that tomorrow is coming.
Saturday night was the darkest night in history. They thought the crucifixion was bad. But now he was still in the tomb. It was the time of greatest doubt. Sadly even those closest to him never understood his words. The Bible seems to indicate that no one was really watching and waiting for him to rise. The women were going to prepare the body. When he did rise they were in shock. Mary Magdalena saw Jesus in the garden and could not recognize him. Instead she thought the Romans had moved his body.
Nevertheless, Jesus revealed himself to them. He proved that everything he said was true. When we are caught is the darkness of Saturday night, just remember Sunday is just a few house away.

Blanket of memories

Right now we have a two beautiful little girls staying with us. They are both very beautiful. As with all foster kids they don’t understand why they we taken away from home.
We had the older ones blanket sitting by the washer so that we could wash it before she used it. The placement was several days ago and both girls seemed to have had no trouble adjusting. Tonight however the older girl saw her blanket.
Fetching it from the laundry room she stood in silence holding it to her chest. I could tell the sadness in her gaze but did not know what the problem was. I helped them get to bed. As I left the room she broke into tears and cried out, “I miss my GG Ma.”
I knelt by her and held her close. My heart broke. She has no idea about the drugs. She does not know that it is bad for a parent to leave a 6 yr old child to care for her two younger siblings while the mother is out all night. All she knows is that she is not home and she misses her GG Ma.